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Trump Recognizes Paris as Capital of France; Germany and UN Livid

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WASHINGTON (Real Fake News) – As expected, President Donald Trump today announced that he is formally recognizing Paris as the capital of France and will be locating the American embassy there.

The international community responded almost unanimously, condemning Trump’s announcement as being in violation of United Nations resolutions and as “unhelpful” in maintaining peace throughout Europe.

“Today I announce what has always been historical fact regardless of the world’s refusal to acknowledge it: Paris is and always has been the eternal capital of France,” said Trump.

French President Emmanuel Macron immediately thanked Trump for his “bold and decisive leadership,” which he said “ushers in a brand new day for the people of France, Europe, and the entire world.”

German Chancellor Angela Merkel, however, reacted angrily, vowing to reverse this “travesty of justice.”

“This unilateral announcement by President Trump predetermines the outcome of negotiations between France and the Rhineland,” said Chancellor Merkel. “The people of the Rhineland have the right to their own nation and expect Paris to be the capital of this nation. We continue to support a two-state solution between the Rhineland and France and condemn in the strongest terms this unilateral action by President Trump.”

President Macron responded by asserting that Paris was “built by the French for the French.”

“The only claim that Rhinelanders have to Paris is rooted in conquest – the fact that the Germans, from which they derive, once conquered it,” said President Macron. “Once the Germans were extricated from Paris, they lost any claim to it. Paris is and always has been the capital of France, and no one else has any legitimate claim to it,” said Macron.

Macron went on to say that “there has never been a country called ‘the Rhineland’ or a people called ‘Rhinelanders.'”

“Paris was never a part of any ‘Nation of Rhineland’ because no such country has ever existed,” said Macron.

Germany and the European Union disputed this assertion, stating that Paris has always been an international city in which the Germans, French, and others have long-standing cultural roots.

“The French have no more historical claim to control over Paris than the Germans or Russians,” said Donald Tusk, President of the European Union.

United Nations Secretary General António Guterres called for an immediate meeting of the Security Council. “The United Nations has always supported a two-state solution, and any action that predetermines the outcome of talks between France and the Rhinelanders is unhelpful,” said Guterres.

Guterres continued, “It is up to the leaders of France and the Rhineland to resolve all disputed issues, including the location of their respective national boundaries, the fate of all Rhineland refugees who were expelled from France after World War II, and the status of Paris.”

Few people expect that the entire city of Paris will become the capital of the Rhineland, but many expect that as part of a final status agreement the Rhineland will include the Champs-Elysées.

The United Nations Security Council is expected to hold an emergency meeting later this week. Although most members of the Security Council are expected to vote in favor of a resolution condemning the United States for its recognition of Paris, the United States is expected to veto that resolution.

It is likely that the UN General Assembly will then convene to consider the resolution, which would be non-binding but embarrassing to the United States and France.

Ken Falkenstein

Author: Ken Falkenstein

Ken Falkenstein is the Managing Editor of Committed Conservative and brings a wealth of experience and expertise in public affairs to the job. Ken served in the U.S. Army in the last years of the Cold War as a Russian linguist for military intelligence and the NSA. After leaving the Army, he earned his degree in Secondary Education from Old Dominion University, where he also wrote a popular column in the student newspaper.

Upon graduation, Ken worked as a Legislative Aide to two Republican members of the Virginia House of Delegates. Ken also served as Corresponding Secretary of the Young Republican Federation of Virginia, managed several successful political campaigns, and managed governmental affairs operations for a local Realtor association.

In 1995, Ken moved to Washington, DC to serve as a Legislative Assistant to Sen. John Warner (R-VA). While working for Sen. Warner, Ken attended law school at night, earning his J.D. with honors from the George Mason University School of Law (n/k/a The Antonin Scalia Law School). Since that time, Ken has practiced as a civil litigation attorney, including serving for three years as an Associate City Attorney for the City of Virginia Beach, Virginia.

Ken previously was a contributor to the highly-regarded political blog Bearing Drift and was a weekly co-host of The Steve Batton Radio Program. In 2016, Ken ran unsuccessfully for the Virginia Beach School Board. Ken is also a former President of the Down Syndrome Association of Hampton Roads.

Ken now lives outside of Denver, Colorado with his wife, Kim, and three sons, Adam, Dylan, and Joshua, who has Down syndrome. Ken’s writing is motivated and informed primarily by his concern for his kids’ future.